Waiting for the punchline? Me too.

JP’s daily commute takes her down arguably the busiest street in Atlanta at the height of rush hour traffic. It’s an exercise in frustration, and this morning was worse than most thanks to the (much-needed) rain that doused the city last night.

It would have been annoying, but far from memorable, were it not for the priest who darted into traffic. He was not in a crosswalk and was crossing against the light. And he ran out with no warning, causing the man in the car in front of her to slam on his breaks. JP slammed on her breaks as well, but it was not enough, thanks to the wet roads.

Her scooter slammed into the back of the car and she went over the handlebars, bruising her stomach and pinning her leg between the bike and the car. Thankfully, she is (mostly) fine. The cop, who was very nice and assured her that the circumstances and weather conditions would convince the judge to reduce the “following too closely” ticket he was required to issue, wanted her to go to the hospital and get checked out, but she didn’t feel it was necessary. I agreed with her, under the condition that she stay with me all day so I can observe her in case she gets worse and needs to go to the Emergency Room. She is resting peacefully now with her leg elevated and a new copy of US Weekly to entertain her. She’s bruised and uncomfortable and shaken, but it could have been much, much worse. I think I’m actually more shaken than she is at this point. She just announced that she was feeling fine and wanted to run a Christmas errand without me. At which point, I broke down and began sobbing because I was scared to let her out of my sight.

The other car received only minor damages (some scuffing and a broken tail light). The scooter sustained some pretty serious damage, but we have comprehensive insurance that should cover all of the repairs. If only my nerves could be repaired as easily.

Meanwhile, you might be asking yourself what became of that man of the cloth. When he heard the screeching of tires of blacktop and saw the collision, did he run to their aid? You might assume that he would be the first to offer assistance and comfort to the young woman laying on the ground, not just because he caused the accident but also because it is his job — no, his “calling” — to care for people as his savior once cared for them . If so, you would be wrong. Because that man of god? He bolted.

Even as people yelled for him to come back, he ran as far and fast as he could with no apparent thought for those who were injured. His only concern seemed to be staying out of trouble. How do you like those family values?